My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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