there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
