You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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