Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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