i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
