Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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