hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
smell my finger.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
