I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
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