Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
