So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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