whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
