i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
