Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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