Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
And then my night got REAL pukey
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
