Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
