Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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