The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
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