so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
