She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
