Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
