i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
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