i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
