I'm drive I can fine osifer
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
i need some magic done to my vagina
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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