I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
