Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
