its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
