that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
