We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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