What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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