You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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