why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
