I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
She needs sedatives and a leash
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
