Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
