belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize