Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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