everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
