i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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