"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
