hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
