after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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