at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
