so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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