There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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