you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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