I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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