Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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