dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Randomize
