Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
