you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
