I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
